Mouth by Puloma Ghosh

Author:Puloma Ghosh
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Astra Publishing House

* * *

Amir and I met an hour before his ticket time so we could get acquainted over a beer at one of the food stands by the anomaly. He arrived in a T-shirt and jeans and was of average physique, slightly shorter than his photos made him seem (of course). We sat at a picnic table with overpriced lagers. It was just past seven, but in late June, the sky was still blue. I learned that Amir was an engineer at a power-tool company. I shruggingly told him I worked customer service.

“That sounds nice, talking to people all day.” He picked at the label on his bottle. “It gets lonely in the lab sometimes.”

“I guess, but it makes me not want to talk to people after work.”

“Like me?” He smiled, teasing.

I smiled back. “Yeah, I hate this.”

I was trying my best to be flirty, and I think he was too, but something wasn’t clicking. Maybe it was just as I had said: I spent all day talking to people, and here I was making small talk with another stranger. I had forgotten how much I disliked these ice-breaking conversations. I had nothing interesting to say about myself. My life was simple: I went to work, picked up groceries on the way home, made dinner, ate in front of the TV. In the summer, I took bike rides or bought flowers at the farmers market. Read a novel on the weekend. Most of my friends lived out of state, so my social scene was contained to seeing my sister and her family every couple weeks, watching a movie with my roommates occasionally, and grabbing a drink with Jenni once in a blue moon. I didn’t mind, though. There were many think pieces written about what it meant to socialize when you were so afraid of anyone you didn’t know. Personally, I was more comfortable on my own, with no need to worry about how other people perceived me. Even when it became safe to mingle again, I continued my reclusive lifestyle. Sure, if I really psychoanalyzed myself, I could connect my recent affinity for detachment to my breakup with Olivia somehow, but what did it matter? I was allowed to be happy regardless.

I took a swig of my beer. “We’re about to go into the anomaly together, so let’s skip the pleasantries.”

Amir turned his bottle and started on the opposite corner of the label. “Okay.”

“Who did you originally plan on bringing here?”

Amir laughed. “An ex, obviously.”

“I knew it,” I replied.

“My turn,” Amir said. “What happened with your most recent ex?”

“She died.”

Amir’s smile fell for a moment, and his eyes changed into this big, shiny, apologetic look. It was comical how sudden and typical his reaction was.

“Just kidding.” I smirked.

He sighed, then laughed again. “That is not funny. I was panicking.”

“My ex broke up with me a few years ago. Haven’t talked to her since. Uncomplicated stuff.”

Kind of. Olivia was diagnosed with late-stage cancer halfway through college, after we’d been together for a year.

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